Ready to Give Up

I am so ready to give up on my goals.  I am so exhausted every single day.  My son works my every nerve because he does not listen to me.  I finally get Kaitlyn to sleep and Nolan is loud and obnoxious.  I seriously have to use every ounce of patience with him and it leaves no patience left over for anyone or anything else.  By the time my husband gets home from work, I'm spent.  I have nothing left to give to myself.  I have 3 awesome workout DVDs just sitting here waiting for me to put them in the player and give them a try but I'm just too tired to care. 

Forgot to mention before but I am also trying to potty train Nolan right now, so that's fun.  He will go pee on the potty, but no poops.  He will go pee on the potty if I put him there, but not on his own.  I have to ask him 12 gazillion times a day if he has to pee and the answer is always "no".  Strange, because when I put him on the potty he goes pee every time!  Then my husband gets home and never asks Nolan if he has to go pee, unless I tell him to.  It just feels to me that I am completely responsible for the potty training but if Nolan pees or poops in a diaper/pull-up then my husband gets upset with him.  Well, how about putting him on the potty a million times a day like I do instead of just when it's convenient for you?!  Ugh.

Frustration

Kaitlyn has been such a great sleeper at night and has been going down for the night so wonderfully since she was born.  I was convinced that God knew I couldn't handle another baby like my son.  He didn't sleep in his crib until he was 6 months old!  Don't ask.  With my father passing away suddenly, I was thinking that her being a good sleeper at night was literally his doing.  Well, now, not so much.  The past two nights she has been getting up more often and tonight she has woken up three times since we put her down for bed at 7pm...it's only 9:15pm.  I am a naturally worrisome person, which I hate but have always been, and I'm so afraid that her awesome nighttime sleeping is coming to an end.  It was a great 2 and 1/2 months, I guess.

She doesn't nap during the day in her crib, no matter what I do, so I know she is tired and probably overtired, but I have tried everything.  I can't just sit in her room with her the whole day trying to get her to nap because my son is here to and I can't just leave him alone all day long.  The only way I've been getting her to nap is in her swing and I know that is not good, but it's the only thing I have right now.  And she will only nap in it once a day for me for a few hours.  She is definitely not getting enough sleep, so what do I do?  I don't want to hold her all day.  I have tried putting her in the BabyBjorn and the Slingling I have, but she cries, even if she is in a good mood when I put her in them.

I'm totally frustrated right this second and hope I'm just overreacting or reading too much into these last few nights.  My husband doesn't appear to care about a schedule, so it's up to me.  I told him when he got home from work tonight that she should go to bed because of the no naps...he kept her up another hour or so.  I know he wants to see her since he didn't all day long, so what do I do?  Help!

Heading to bed.  Don't know how much sleep I'll get.  Screw my goals for today. 

Introducing...Kaitlyn Frances

Hello everyone.  As many of you know, my father passed away very unexpectedly on April 28th and I was induced on April 30th so that I would be able to attend the funeral.  It has been a very very difficult time for myself and my family...I still cannot believe my dad is gone.  I was very close with him and miss him so much that it hurts, physically.  But, I do have to put most of my energy into taking care of my newborn daughter, Kaitlyn Frances (my dad's middle name was Francis) and my son, Nolan.  Thankfully, my husband has been off work for two weeks and has been my rock and my best friend.  He is the only reason I have made it through this difficult time. 

Kaitlyn was born on April 30th weighing in at 7 lbs 3 oz and measuring 20 inches long.  It was a relatively uncomplicated birth as we checked in at 8am and I delivered her at 2:21pm.  She is absolutely beautiful and everyone who meets her is in love with her. 

Hopefully I will be back blogging soon, but right now I'm enjoying time with my family.

Still Pregnant

I'm 39 weeks and 3 days pregnant and I'm trying to enjoy these last few days because I know our lives will soon change, again, very drastically.  As much as I know there will be sleepless nights, difficult feedings and messy diapers, I just want to have my body back.  I hope that isn't too selfish but I am as big as a house (see evidence below) and so uncomfortable...though I don't think I'm nearly as uncomfortable as when I was pregnant with my son because I'm not as swollen.

So, we had a doctor's appointment yesterday and my doctor is sending us to the hospital Saturday morning, my due date, for a NST and if everything looks good I have already scheduled another doctor's appointment for a week from today.  She said otherwise, she will just induce me on Saturday.  I am not a fan of being induced - I was with my son but it was 5 days after my due date and it went smoothly - especially for being my first pregnancy.  I have this strange feeling that she is just going to induce me Saturday no matter what the results of the NST are because a) she is working on-call at the hospital this entire weekend, therefore she would be the one to deliver me and b) she told me she isn't going to let me go more than a week past my due date.

We'll see how the rest of this week goes.  I would love for my baby girl to show up via her own schedule so I will be continuing my long walks with my son every day and praying that she comes soon! 

Prefolds, Fitteds and Covers

Okay, so next cloth diapering questions...what are the best prefolds, fitted diapers and covers for a newborn?  How many of these will I need?  I think I'm leaning towards these for my baby girl in her first few months and have been researching all day...my fingers and brain both hurt!  So, I thought I'd turn to my cloth diaper blogger friends! 

My son was 7 pounds 4 ounces when he was born and my doctor says I'm measuring right on target (not big or small) so I'm thinking baby girl will be between 7-8 pounds when she is born.  Since I'm planning on breastfeeding again, she is most likely going to lose a little bit of weight right away before my milk is completely in.  Just a little background on what size I think she will be.

Thanks in advance for your recommendations and suggestions!  I really do read all of the comments and am very appreciative!

Not Ready

Had my weekly OB/GYN appointment today and I am 1 and 1/2 cm dialated and baby's head is very, very low...so now I'm starting to freak out!  I guess it just didn't hit me until today's appointment that I don't have very long left until baby girl arrives!  I haven't packed my hospital bag and there are a few more things I want to hang in her room plus I feel like she isn't going to have enough to wear since I don't have many newborn clothes and my doctor thinks she will be between 7 and 8 pounds.  Ugh.  I don't know why all of a sudden I'm worrying about these things?

The biggest thing I am worried about is my son.  I keep thinking I have so much more time with just him at home than I actually do.  I want to make sure every day we do something fun and exciting, yet I'm so big and exhausted that it takes all my energy to play cars and trains with him in the family room...let alone taking him to the zoo and walking for 2 and 1/2 hours (which I did yesterday and am paying for today!).  I just want to make the arrival of his baby sister a joyous and fun event for him!  Luckily, my husband will be home for the two weeks following baby girl's birth, so our son will have undivided attention from at least one of us most of the time.

I don't remember what my life was like before my brother was born when I was 3 and 1/2 so I am assuming our son won't remember his life before his sister, but I still have some mommy-guilt like I'm completely turning his world upside-down over night.  He is such a good little boy and I just hope he adapts well to his baby sister.  I think he will eventually...let's just hope it's sooner rather than later!  :)

My doctor insists he doesn't think I'll make it to my due date (May 1st) so if you all of a sudden don't see any posts, or more shockingly, any tweets from me...then I'm probably in labor!  I don't have a fancy phone so I won't be updating Twitter (have no clue how to do that from my phone) and I may update Facebook, but definitely not my blog, until I return.

Wish me luck in these last few weeks and if you have more than one child, maybe you could share with me some ways to make our transition easier!

Questions, Questions, Questions...about Cloth Diapering

I am brand new to the world of Cloth Diapers.  My baby girl is due 3 weeks from today and I really want to start off right away using cloth diapers.  Soooooo, since I have so many questions and have read so many things on so many different websites in the past 2 months, I was hoping to reach out to those of you who read my blog and also use cloth diapers. 

I will be posting a question I have regarding cloth diapering every few days from now until I give birth (whenever that may be)...that's how many questions I have.  :)  I guess I have so many because I already have a 2 and 1/2 year old son whom I didn't cloth diaper so my I'm brainwashed into the "easy" world of sposies.  Please help me!

Question for today: What do I need to have in my stash on Day 1?  If you currently cloth diaper, could you tell me what you had on Day 1 and also what you wished you had that you didn't?  Also, if you had to start all over again, what would you have in your stash on Day 1 (for purposes of this discussion, budget is irrelevant...within reason!).  I guess that is more than one question, but I would greatly appreciate any guidance or help you can offer.

Thanks again, in advance, and if you know anyone else who could help me and has a blog, please let me know and I'll follow their blogs too!  I am a cloth diapering information junkie!!!

New Diaper Bag!

As promised, though a day late, here are some photos of my new diaper bag...one of the only purchases I have made for myself in getting ready for baby girl to arrive!  I just figured, after 2 and 1/2 years with the same bag, I can splurge and get a new one!  :)  I love it and it has tons of great features...love the pattern, the fact that I can put a few photos under the clear plastic windows which are under the lift up flap and I love the wide, padded strap!

It is made by Ju.Ju.Be and I bought it at Buy Buy Baby (with a 20% of coupon, of course!).  It wasn't cheap but I never buy anything for myself and my Mom convinced me it was too cute to pass up!  I love it and feel we're one step closer to being ready for baby girl to arrive!  YAY!!!

Baby Event at Loving My Life Reviews

Alright, all you moms like me who are pregnant and will be expecting a little bundle of baby joy real soon, mark your calendars for the Baby Event over at Loving My Life Reviews which will be taking place in May/June after Sarah has her baby (boy #2!). 

Since I am pregnant and due to have our baby girl around May 1st, I am really looking forward to this event and the great giveaways!  Here is a partial list of the sponsors she has set up for the Baby Event: Sleepy Wrap, Apple Cheeks, Nifty Nappy, Rockin' Green Soap and many more!  Go check out what other sponsors are currently taking part in the event at the Loving My Life Reviews blog (just click on my link).

Good News!

Had my OB/GYN appointment this morning and my doctor reassured us that our baby girl's kidney issue was a) probably going to correct itself if it is a kink (which he feels it most likely is and he said it is more common in girls) and b) if it is a blockage of some sort, it is completely fixable at a later date and that my pediatrician will at least know now before any infection, etc.  So, we are feeling a lot better about it, but if you are a parent you know how it feels to have anything unexpected happen when it comes to your child(ren).

On a much happier note...and a surprise note...my parents and brother came down to watch our son while we went to the doctor and when we got back from the appointment, my mom said she wanted to go with me to pick out a new diaper bag (my one splurge for this baby since she already has hand-me-down swing, bouncer, clothes, etc.).  I found one (will post pic tomorrow, so cute!) but then she insisted that she and my dad wanted to buy us the stroller I wanted!  What?!!?  How awesome!  I felt bad accepting, but she really wanted to do this so we got the Sit N Stand since my son doesn't stay in his current stroller very long anymore.  I figured this way, when I take them to the zoo, park, mall, whatever, he can just hop in and out and I won't have to worry about it.

Anyway, I'm off to bed after such a busy day!  Hoping you all have wonderful weekends! 

My Baby Girl

So, last Friday at my regular OB/GYN appointment, my doctor told me she would like me to get another ultrasound.  Now, if you've ever been pregnant, when you hear your doctor say those words, panic usually takes over...and for me, it did.  She then said she was reviewing my files before she came in and noticed at my 20 week ultrasound that the tech mentioned that my placenta was low-lying.  Since she didn't specifically measure how far away from my cervix the placenta was, my doctor wanted me to get another ultrasound to have them measure exactly how far it was.  Phew...okay, I can handle that news, is what I thought.  Worse case scenario is that I have to have a C-Section, right?  I didn't have one with my son, but that is okay, it is not my ideal situation but I was prepared to handle it. 

Then she said she also wanted them to check my baby's kidneys.  Ugh.  Knife to the heart.  What?  Why?  Nobody had mentioned anything to me before about her kidneys.  I had been there MANY times since my December ultrasound and seen all three doctors in the practice...none of them had mentioned anything about my daughter's kidneys!  She said that at my 20 week ultrasound the tech also documented that there was a bit of fluid in the kidneys and my doctor said it usually goes away and is nothing to worry about, but that she wanted to have an ultrasound to re-check them.  Okay, I worried about it for a while but when you have a 2 year old wanting your attention, you kind of put it to the back of your mind.  I prayed every night that everything would be okay with my baby and that if anything had to be wrong, please let it be with me, not her.

We had our ultrasound yesterday and my placenta is fine, but her left kidney has fluid in it.  Ugh, I lost it.  My husband was there with me and luckily the tech left for a minute and I just started crying.  I know, I'm pregnant and the hormones are crazy-out-of-control but I was so upset.  I feel like it is something I did, even though I know that is ridiculous to think.  We met with a doctor afterward who assured us that her other kidney was functioning at 100% and she was urinating fine, etc. so there was enough amniotic fluid around her and she was fine.  The doctor said that it was likely one of two things...either a kink in the vessel that takes urine to the bladder, thus causing a backup of liquid in her kidney or there was a faulty valve between her bladder and her left kidney.  She said that after she is born, my doctor will refer us to a specialist and they will determine whether/when surgery is necessary.  I am just picturing my little baby girl having to undergo surgery and it is an awful feeling.  BUT, the doctor said that she is fine.

Thank GOODNESS my doctor caught this, is all I can think!  I am glad I know this information now instead of when my daugher is having a urinary tract infection, which is what can happen if this goes un-checked, and she could possibly have lost the kidney if she kept having infections and we didn't catch them, etc.  So, I am glad to be informed, just feel awful for my little girl. 

I just needed to get this out because I'm just a wreck about it inside.  I'm a natural-born-worrier so it doesn't surprise me that I'm so emotional about this and my husband is feeling much better after meeting with the doctor yesterday.  I'm feeling better about it too, just having trouble knowing our baby may have to have surgery while she is so tiny. 

One good thing came yesterday though...when the tech was doing the ultrasound, she was showing us our baby's head and she was head down, which is good at 33+ weeks and she was looking sideways kind of...so we could see her face on the monitor!  It seriously took my breath away!  I didn't have an ultrasound this late in my son's pregnancy, so it was just amazing to see her little face there looking at us.  She was blinking and moving her lips and nose.  I teared up and was just so happy to see her.  She has chubby cheeks already!  It is just so hard to picture a full-grown baby inside of me, even this being my second pregnancy and to see her face filled me with so much love.  Maybe that is why I'm so emotional about her kidney...I know picture her face when I think of her...not just a little bean.

Please keep us in your prayers!

'Fluff the Bum' Cloth Diaper Event at The Eco-Cheap Mom (April 1st-30th)

As you all know, our baby girl will be arriving in less than 2 months (WHAT?!?!) and I am very determined to use cloth diapers with her to save money, landfill waste and because they are just overall cute! 

I will admit, when I first thought of cloth diapering I was thinking folding and pinning diapers to my baby...and that just wasn't appealing!  I also thought they would be difficult to clean and would be a hassle to travel with for long trips, etc.!  Then I started researching cloth diapering and found that all of the things that came to mind when I originally contemplated this, were incorrect!  Cloth diapers have come SO FAR since our parents' time!  They are economical, cute, toxin-free and overall as easy to use as disposables!

So, how happy was I to find out that Chanda over at The Eco-Chic Mom would be hosting a cloth diaper event (FLUFF THE BUM) on her blog from April 1st through April 30th?!?!  She will be reviewing all sorts of cloth diapers and cloth diapering accessories and with each review she will be including a giveaway to her blog followers!  So, scoot on over and follow her blog...quick!  You will get to learn all about cloth diapering and hopefully win a giveaway...or two!  I am very excited to read her reviews as I'm still trying to figure out what path to journey down with cloth diapers...there are MANY options!

Good luck and if I win a giveaway from The Eco-Chic Mom Cloth Diaper Event, I will be sure to post my winnings and own review here on my blog so you can find out how it worked out with my baby!

We're in the Home Stretch!

Had my first bi-monthly OB/GYN checkup today...I'm officially 30 weeks, 3 days, but I think my due date is incorrect by about a week.  Anyway, I can't believe how quickly the second trimester flew by!  Probably because the first trimester was so long due to severe sickness and the boredom as a result of the sickness. 

We still have so much to do before our baby arrives and I don't know when it is going to be completed!  Her room is driving me crazy!  My husband doesn't understand how badly I want it completely done and set up...he's worrying about building a freakin' cedar closet in the basement!  Hello?  I could care less about that right now!  We have a baby coming and nothing done to her room but paint...well, we have the furniture in the room, but I don't like how it's set up, and probably never will...just no good way to place everything.  AND, we are both accounting-types so we have no clue how to decorate or arrange furniture.  I wish I did because I LOVE decorating/organization/etc.  Hoping to take a class or two on those subjects someday!  I digress...so I am going to spend some of my Mommy Bonus this week/weekend and purchase curtain rods for both of the children's rooms.  I bought curtains last weekend, so we're making progress!

Now, if only the weather would warm up I'd be a very happy Mommy!  Too bad it's supposed to snow this weekend...ugh...I dislike MI winters!

Britax Car Seat Giveaway

Planning is definitely in full swing for Baby #2 at our house!  One large and very important purchase is another car seat.  Our son, Nolan, is currently in a Britax Marathon car seat and we all love it!  He is 35 pounds (he was 30 pounds at 1 year old!) and still has plenty of room in the car seat!  It goes up to 65 pounds and has the 5-point-harness system that I feel most safe using.  It is so easy to buckle him in and get him out that, naturally, we have decided we will be purchasing another Britax car seat for our daughter.

Britax has so many amazing car seats that it does get a bit overwhelming when choosing one, but I am reassured that any one we choose will be safe because Britax is an amazing company with excellent safety ratings! 

That being said, I'm always on the lookout for a good deal, especially being a stay at home mom, and I found one in regards to a new car seat I feel safe using!  I'm crossing my fingers that I win the Britax Advocate CS Convertible Car Seat Giveaway at Baby GoodBuys.  This amazing site is giving away one Britax Advocate CS and it is quite simple to enter the giveaway.  Just click on Baby GoodBuys and follow the instructions...too easy!  Good luck entering (but I hope I win!).

Taylor Joelle Weekly Hot Buy

Okay, so I'm having a little girl and EVERYTHING is so darn cute for girls!!!  It's been so hard to restrain myself and then I found Taylor Joelle Designs.  OMG!  I love everything at this store and am now signed up for their weekly Hot Buy email newsletter!  The shoes they have up right now are a-dorable!  AND they are only $2.99...regularly $23.50!  Hello!?!?  What!?!?  I haven't purchased them yet...decided to sleep on it and if they are still there in the morning, I will buy them...it's only $5 shipping to my house, so that is still an AWESOME price for these adorable shoes! 

I Have Fluff!

Okay, so I am still debating on fully throwing myself into cloth diapering my soon-to-be-born daughter, but in the meantime, I have decided if I find a cloth diaper at a great price, why not buy it and try it out!??!  My husband probably wouldn't agree with this logic as it involves spending money, but it's what I'm doing. 

Anyway, Green Baby Bargains had All in One Pocket Thirsties diapers on last week and I bought one small and one large lavender one.  I got them in the mail yesterday and they are adorable!!!  They look pretty self-explanatory and appear that even my brother could put them on a baby!  It really makes me want to do CD full-time, even if it isn't the fully-crunchy way (using prefolds, snappis and covers).

Cloth Diapering?

As I have previously noted, I am pregnant and due to have a baby girl on May 2nd.  As I have not previously noted, I am seriously considering going the cloth diapering route with her.  Issues I am currently having with cloth diapering:

1. I didn't cloth diaper my son, so all I know are disposables.
2. My husband, family and most friends only know disposables.
3. Even after reading a million blogs and visiting another million CD websites, I still don't know what type of CD system would work best for our family.
4. I am unsure about CD during the newborn stage...especially since I won't know how big my baby is until she is born.  My son was 7 lbs, 4 oz and 20 in long.  My doctor says I'm measuring about 1/2 to a week bigger than my due date...which means nothing.
5. I don't quite know how the middle of the night changes work with CD.  I vaguely remember the newborn stage, so I can't figure out how we will change a poopy diaper in the middle of the night using CD and where to put the dirty diaper, etc.  She will be sleeping in a bassinet in our room for a while...that's the plan anyway.  So will we have to go to the bathroom, rinse the diaper, go to her room to put the dirty diaper into wherever they go and change her into a new CD in our room?  The logistics just are confusing me right now.
6. How do you rinse the poopy diapers without a diaper sprayer?  I have a 2 year old son and though I'm not 100% sure how a diaper sprayer works, I have an inkling he would love to use it as a weapon/toy/something else equally destructive to our beautiful new bathroom.
7. Will her clothes fit horribly?  Since we have a son, we were lucky enough to have a friend with a little girl who saved all of her clothing and is letting us have it all!  This is going to save us a ton of money...but not if none of them fit because the CD are so bulky.
8. I can't think of any other issues, but I'm sure there are more...they keep me up at night.

So, yes, I really am interested in CD and don't have anyone to talk to who has done this before.  My one friend who doesn't use disposables, uses gDiapers, which from what I've researched are a hybrid system.  Do I just do this?  HELP!